The Paga Diaries (18) by Arizona Wanderer: ‘Tea with Free Women and Comfort in Kaissa’

 

My mind was numb as I walked toward Mirus’s house to get my second stabilization injection.  When I arrived, I knocked on the front door of his mansion.  Fen, his assistant answered the door and invited me in.  He told me that he would be handling today’s injection as the Physician was occupied at the moment.  I wondered if Mirus was occupied with the appraisal of the gemstones I had left with him. 

 

We went into the windowless green patient room.  Fen was quick with the injection and the pain became nothing.  I left the house after saying that I would return tomorrow for the next shot. 

 

I did not know what to do next.  I really wanted to go to the tarncot and see Trem and Jesop and learn more about tarns.  I also had a powerful need for a strong drink.  But drinking and tarns don’t mix.  I started to walk to the tarncot.

 

As I walked, I kept replaying the events of the morning with Penny.  I knew her name was really Five, but she was Penny to me.   I kept thinking about what I should have done different with Lenious, her master, in my attempt to purchase her.  What had gone wrong?  Why wouldn’t he sell her to me, especially for the high price I offered? 

 

After a pasang or so, I walked past a building that had a unique smell of something freshly baked, with spices.  I wasn’t hungry yet but the smell was unique enough to draw my attention into seeing what it was.  The building had an open door and I walked in.  There were several low tables placed about the room with large spaces between them.  Only two of the tables had anyone at them, both of them with groups of women, wearing veils and robes of concealment.  The women were laughing and did not pay any attention to me.  I noticed another door that opened out into a beautiful back courtyard area. 

 

I walked into this area which was shaded by large trees.  Various bushes with flowers grew next to a stone wall that lined the perimeter.  Some of the flowers were a beautiful scarlet with five large petals.  There were low tables set under the shade trees.  In addition to the shade, there were several small canopies that each had a low table in the centre.  Half of the tables in this courtyard were occupied, mostly by women.  As I looked around, I only noticed two tables where men sat with women.  

 

From somewhere came the sound of a stringed instrument.  The music was relaxing and simple, but also elegant.  I played guitar on Earth and I missed it.  I wondered what this instrument was, and if its strings were stretched over a long neck, and if I could play it. 

 

I went to a table in the shade.  The table next to it had two women in veils and robes of concealment, and they glanced at me as I knelt on a cushion next to it.  I fumbled with my sword, putting it in a comfortable position as I knelt. 

 

A slave girl in a yellow knee length tunic came and knelt next to me.  She knelt in a high tower with her knees together.  I thought that was odd.  Every slave who had knelt before me in the past had always spread their knees wide. The slave girl was thin, with brown hair and rather plain looking face. 

 

She looked at me and said, “Hello Master, I apologize for not greeting you as you came in. Welcome to the Talendar Blossom. My name is Petal, how may I serve you?”

 

“What is baking?” I asked.

 

“Oh yes Master, that is our special honey cake.  It pairs well with Bazi tea.”

 

“Cake and paga,” I said.

 

“I am sorry Master, we do not have paga.”

 

“Ka-la-na?” I asked.

 

“Yes Master, we have several varieties of ka-la-na.  What is your preference?”

 

“Red.”

 

“Yes, Master,” she said before standing up to fetch my order.

 

She returned quickly with a tray, knelt and presented a plate with cake and a small glass of ka-la-na.  The freshly baked cake was warm, moist and sweet.  It was delicious.  There were delicate spices in the cake that complimented the honey.  It was these spices that I had smelled on the street. 

 

The ka-la-na was good too, but the glass was too small and dainty.  I finished it quickly and motioned for more.  Three glasses later, I was looking for the slave girl to bring a fourth, when I noticed the two women who were sitting at the table next to mine, looking at me.  They had stopped talking to themselves.  I tipped my hat to them in acknowledgement, not knowing another way to do so politely.  It is very hard to interpret the mood of a woman when most of her expressions are hidden behind a veil.  Their eyes did not appear friendly.  I felt awkward and wasn’t sure if I should say something, now that they were just looking at me.

 

“Do you frequently enter teahouses wearing a sword, order paga, and then quaff ka-la-na?” the woman asked.  She was the closest to me, of the two.  She had blue eyes and a pleasant voice.  The skin I could see above her veil was very white, pale. 

 

Umm, what?  I thought to myself, trying to comprehend what she said and its meaning.

 

“Sorry, Gorean not good, what is quaff?” I asked.

 

“Are you a barbarian?”

 

“Yes. I not want disturb anyone. I will leave,” I replied.

 

“Come join us barbarian,” she said, and the woman sitting next to her gave her an immediate look.  She had big brown eyes.

 

“Yes,” I said, standing up.  “I am Rykart.”

 

“Tal, I am Lady Filomena Viducia Barbieta and this is Lady Cosima Polamca. Where are you from Rykart?”

 

“I am from Arizona,” I said.

 

“I have never heard of Arizona.”

 

“It is far away, past Barrens,” I said.

 

“Interesting. Are you from Earth?”

 

“Yes. Arizona on Earth,” I said.

 

“Far past the Barrens, yes. How did you get to Gor?”

 

“On ship,” I said.  I wasn’t comfortable with questions about the details of how I came to Gor.  I looked for the slave girl to have more ka-la-na brought to me.  I wondered if I could just buy a bottle of ka-la-na.  These wine glasses were tiny, a nuisance.  I wondered how much I would be charged for each glass. 

 

“Yes of course.  Every barbarian I know of, who is brought to Gor from Earth, comes on a ship.  They come as slaves.  Earth is also known as the Slave World.  I should have asked if you came to Gor enslaved.  You look very free to me.  Are you a former slave, Rykart?”

 

“No. I came Free Man,” I replied.

 

“Interesting.  Are you a warrior?” Filomena asked, glancing at my tucked sword.

 

“No. Sword for being safe.”

 

“What brings you into the Talendar Blossom today, ordering paga, but guzzling ka-la-na?” she asked.

 

“Bad morning, need think.”

 

“What was so bad Rykart?” she asked.

 

I wasn’t sure how to start relating the story or even if I should.  It is difficult to tell a story when one isn’t fluent.  My mind was confused.  What bothered me most about this morning?  Not being able to buy Penny, but also the likelihood of not seeing her again and not receiving any more lessons from her.

 

“Tried buying slave for teach me Gorean.”

 

“Why would you buy a slave to teach you Gorean? A scribe or professional teacher would be much more appropriate,” she said.

 

“Penny is scribe.”

 

“Was a scribe. Scribes are of a caste and slaves don’t have any caste. Did you know this slave before you tried to buy her?” she asked.

 

“Yes. We met some mornings for lessons.” I did my best to tell the story of how Penny had been giving me Gorean lessons.  How we randomly walked around the city streets, learning things that were of interest. 

 

“Penny’s master approved of these lessons?”

 

“He not know,” I said.

 

“I imagine her master was very angry about these secret meetings. She should be severely punished.”

 

“I pay her every time,” I said.

 

“How do you know that she gave that money to her master?”

 

“I put in coin box,” I said.

 

“The slave is a coin girl? You chose the lowest form of slave to spend time with and teach you Gorean? Then you try and purchase her! Your story keeps getting better. Are you in love with Penny, Rykart?”

 

“No. Like her. Fond? She is good teacher,” I said.

 

“Did you put this coin girl to use, or just meet her for Gorean lessons?”

 

“Yes, many times put to use,” I said, probably blushing as I remembered my original reluctance and embarrassment with putting Penny to use.  

 

“Why wouldn’t her master sell her to you?”

 

“I do not know. I tried, I offer more than enough silver. He has several other coin girls,” I said.

 

“How much did you offer him? Did he name a price that you couldn’t afford?”

 

“I offer all coin I had, ten silver. He not name price to me. Penny not for sale.”

 

“That is a lot of silver for a coin girl Rykart. Are you sure that you haven’t fallen in love with this slave girl?”

 

“I will miss her. I need her teach Gorean,” I said.

 

“Why did you come to Gor?”

 

“Many reason. Own kajira. Find happiness. Adventure.” I answered.

 

“Do you think owning a woman will make you happy?”

 

“Yes.”

 

“Have you ever owned a slave? They require a lot of responsibility and attention, and they will spoil if not properly disciplined.”

 

“Never own woman. Whip teach women their place,” I said. 

 

“Well, the whip teaches slaves to obey their owners, both male and female slaves. Do you think kajira love the men they serve?  The men that whip them, use them and sell them?”

 

“Yes, women are submissive, meant to serve men,” I said. 

 

Filomena laughed and said, “Spoken like a Gorean male! You are a sleen like most men! Do you know that on Gor, the vast majority of women are Free, and not slaves.”

 

I still didn’t know what a sleen was, but I knew it was an animal and being called one probably wasn’t a compliment.  “I not know of Free Women.  But they are women, and women are submissive, no?”

 

The two women looked at each other briefly before Filomena answered.  “Well, don’t you think a woman who is free to make her own choices would be happier than one who does not, a slave with no choice?”

 

“Yes,” I admitted.

 

“And a woman who is happy is much more likely to make any man she is with, happy as well?”

 

“Yes,” I said again.

 

“A free happy woman with a happy man is very likely to find love for each other and what they have, making for a blissful Free Companionship.”

 

“Umm, Free Companionship?” I said, struggling with the new word, and others.

 

“Yes, the joining of two free happy people. Most men and women on Gor are free and enjoy each other in a Free Companionship relationship.”

 

“Penny happy with me,” I replied.

 

“And is she happy now, with her angry master?”

 

I cringed on the inside when Filomena asked that, the memory of Penny being harshly bound and led down the street by her master, away from me.

 

“Women are meant to serve men,” I said.

 

“Women and men are meant to complement each other.”

 

There was no way I could debate Filomena, and I did not want to.  Not being fluent was a severe handicap and the veil on her face only made it worse.  I had never had a conversation with a woman with her mouth covered.  Not seeing her lips and expressions just didn’t seem natural, it was awkward.  Filomena was making good points in her promotion of a free “companionship” between men and women but I really wanted to own a woman.  I wanted the experience of owning a woman completely and not just for an ahn in a paga alcove every night.

 

“You may be right. My Gorean not good. Hard to understand with face cover,” I said.  I stood up, now wanting more ka-la-na or something stronger, but not here.  

 

“Are you leaving Rykart? We were just getting to know you.”

 

“Yes. Pleasure meet Gorean Ladies Filomena and Cosima,” I said, struggling with their names.

 

“Perhaps another time, Rykart?  I know of a Scribe who may be willing to help you learn Gorean,” Filomena said.  Cosima gave her another look.

 

“Yes, another time. Need Scribe, need help with Gorean,” I said.

 

“We are here several times a week. Come and visit again,” she said.

 

I paid for my ka-la-na and honey cake.  The prices were more reasonable than what I expected. 

 

As I left, I heard the pleasant melody of a stringed instrument playing softly in the background of the tea house.  

 

*******************

 

I left the tea house and the two Free Women I had met inside.  The conversation I had with them was strange and unpleasant and was on my mind as I walked away.  After the rough morning I had losing Penny, I was in no mood to argue with unfamiliar women about the happiness levels of kajira versus Free Women.

 

Filomena had made some good points, simple straightforward statements that were hard to dispute.  Sure, women who have free choice are most likely to be happier than slaves with no choice.  But I felt that women are naturally submissive to men and can find happiness and even love for a man who confidently protects them with dominant authority.  The display of this natural authority is a powerful attractant for most women.  Most women feel it, but when asked, don’t want to admit the truth of this attraction, and can’t explain its reality. 

 

I wondered about how happy Free Women really were on Gor.  The ones in Argentum all wore cumbersome robes, concealing their body shapes.  They wore veils that covered their faces and their hair is hidden too.  Was this the current fashion for women in Argentum, or a style of dress imposed by culture?  Did other cities on Gor have similar fashions or cultures?  If this form of dress was custom here, how free were Free Women? They didn’t seem to have much choice in their appearance.  

Did their “Free Companion” men indulge in the pleasures of paga tavern kajirae?  What man could resist the temptation and ease of access to these delightful submissive beauties for any length of time?  Did Free Women condone the use of kajirae by the men in their companionship?  If they did, how happy could they be, knowing their men were being pleased by another woman?  I was starting to think that though many kajira on Gor were probably not happy, I imagined that there are plenty of unhappy Free Women as well. 

 

I didn’t want to think about it anymore.  I walked down the street with no direction in mind.  I was thirsty for another drink. I thought about what Filomena had said, “That is a lot of silver for a coin girl Rykart.”  So, I had been more than reasonable with my offer to buy Penny.  What was it then, why didn’t Lenious sell her to me?  Perhaps I was not understanding some strange facet of Gorean culture.

 

I walked for a while, wandering.  I had come to Gor with an eager excitement of being a true man, assuming a natural masculine role, owning a woman.  Owning them completely, and ready to experience every detail that went with it.  Marriage or the Gorean version of it, Free Companionship, was not something that had ever entered my mind.  Of course I wanted any woman I owned to be happy.  I truly believed that a woman who belonged to me, served and obeyed me, would also be able to find content and satisfaction fulfilling a woman’s purpose, serving men.  I believe such fulfilment makes many women happy, and even fosters feelings of love.   

My path through the city streets was aimless for a while until I realized that I was close to the tarncot tower.  Now I headed there, and when I arrived, I used the pass Trem had given me to enter.  I walked up the long circular staircase to the top and banged on the tarncot door.  Trem opened the door and Jesop was behind him. 

 

“Tal Trem, Jesop,” I said, looking at them.

 

“Tal,” they both replied.

 

“What have you been doing? Did you bring me anything?” Jesop asked, excited to see me.  Trem frowned.

 

“Yes Jesop, I have candy,” I said and gave it to the boy.  I had stopped to buy some after deciding to come up here. 

 

“Thank you!” he said.

 

“Don’t eat it all now,” said Trem.

 

“How can I help in tarncot?” I asked.

 

I helped Trem and Jesop for a bit putting tarn saddles and gear away that was on the launch ramp.  Trem said the tarncot had been busy this morning with military flights and racing teams coming in to prepare for the upcoming tarn race.  

 

“You seem deep in thought this morning Rykart, is there something on your mind?” Trem asked.

 

“Yes, this morning, tried buy slave. Not go good,” I replied.

 

“Tell me about it, let’s go to my office,” Trem said.

 

“Can I come too? I want to hear!” asked Jesop.

 

“No Jesop, finish your work,” Trem said.

 

We went into Trem’s office and I told him the whole story of Penny.  He was quiet as I related the details of meeting her, seeing her frequently for lessons and then this morning, when I tried to buy her from her master.  When I was done he asked, “How much did you offer Penny’s master in the end, what was his name again?”

 

“Lenious. I offered ten silver,” I said.

 

He raised his eyebrows and said, “That is a lot of money for a kajira Rykart, especially a coin girl.  And you said you always met her in the mornings?”

 

“Yes.”

 

“I have never seen a coin girl on the street in the morning. They always come out in the evening, maybe late afternoon.  Something about this coin girl is odd.  I can tell that you like this slave and that you are upset. You should forget about her. We will go to the Feasting Tarn tonight and help you move on from this. Learning Gorean from a slave was a good idea, especially from one who was a scribe. You can come up here whenever you want, Jesop and I will teach you Gorean,” he said. 

 

“I should not use kajira for Gorean?”  

 

“Ahh!  I’m sure that would be a lot more fun than working up here and learning! I didn’t think you wanted to own a slave until you had become more Gorean?” he asked.

 

“If I own kajira for teach, I control lesson, when I want,” I replied. “What about pay Scribe?” I said, thinking about what Filomena had advised.

 

“Sure, that would work, and you would have control over the lesson schedule. Lessons from a Scribe probably won’t be cheap,” he said.

 

Trem withdrew a leather covered bag from his desk, a bota bag that contained paga. He removed the stopper at top of the bag and said “Paga?”  

 

“You said no drink near tarns?” I asked.

 

“I am done with tarns today. We are leaving early and going to the Feasting Tarn. Roast tabuk, kajirae and paga will help remind you what it is, to be a man of Gor.  Maybe play some kaissa too,” he said.

 

Jesop begged us to take him with us, pleading with his grey eyes.  Trem later told me that he thought he had made a mistake taking the boy to the Tarn.  He had taken Jesop a couple times as a reward for working hard. Now Jesop constantly nagged about when might be his next trip.  Trem asked me not to talk of the tavern in front of Jesop.

 

We went to Trem’s favourite spot in the Feasting Tavern, the rooftop.  It was a nice sunny day with a slight breeze on the top of the building.  Trem greeted several friends as we walked through to a corner.  He introduced them to me.  Two of them were Tarnsmen who had spent the day readying themselves to ride in the upcoming race.  

 

Sabit was a racer, short and stocky with curly brown hair.  He wore a green and silver striped leather vest over his green tunic.  The vest was very flashy and it briefly reminded me of a high visibility construction safety vest on Earth.  His garments looked like a uniform for a sports team.  There was a patch sewn on to the vest, a symbol of a green arrow or streak.  He was very friendly and jovial, ordering pagas for both of us.  He and Trem talked and laughed a couple times.  Sabit seemed very excited to see Trem.  He spoke so quickly that I found it difficult to understand anything he was saying.  I struggled to grasp single words in his rapid speech.  

He asked me something and I had no idea what the question was.  Instead of saying “What?”, I stuttered into trying to say that I couldn’t speak Gorean, Trem told him that I was a barbarian.  Sabit gave me an interesting look, and then went right back into his banter with Trem.

 

We drank paga and had tabuk dishes for supper.  I didn’t say much.  Trem eventually asked if we wanted to play kaissa downstairs.  The three of us went downstairs and found Arlonis sitting at a kaissa board ready to play.  Trem and Sabit flipped a coin to see who would play Arlonis first.  Trem won the toss and Sabit and I watched their opening moves.  

 

I asked Sabit, “Play kaissa?” while pointing at myself.  

 

“A barbarian who plays kaissa?” he said smiling, “Sure!”

 

Sabit let me go first and our first game did not last very long, he beat me easily.  I set up the pieces to play again.  He let me go first again and this time our game lasted longer.  We had more paga served to us as we played and he beat me again.

 

“One more?” I asked.  Sabit agreed, and once again let me move first.  I was getting better with using my pieces to coordinate attacks on his weaker areas, exchanging pieces to my advantage while attempting to retain an offensive posture.  In the first two games Sabit had placed me into positions requiring defensive moves.  This game was different.  

 

Arlonis had beat Trem in their long game and were taking a break, now watching my game.  Sabit wasn’t smiling anymore and called for more paga.  I kept the pressure on, while expecting him to surprise me with some unseen counter moves that would put the game into his favour.  We exchanged more pieces and I started to see a possible combination of moves that would lead to the capture of his Home Stone.  I became anxious and tried to remain calm, waiting for his counter. 

 

I began to wonder with excitement, maybe Sabit had no counter this time!  Two more pieces fell and were exchanged.  Three moves more and I captured the Home Stone.  I had finally won a game!  Sabit looked up at me with a wry smile and said, “Good job Rykart.”  Trem and Arlonis were laughing.  Trem said to Sabit, “You have been beaten by a barbarian!  Let’s go find some sluts to take to the alcoves.”